As I stood there at the edge of the cliff, I was aware of everything around me. My body was there but my senses were divided and my soul was visiting the cherished memories. I stood there all alone, embracing the silence. The sky was a clear vibrant blue and the sun was shining as brightly as it could. I was very close to death; staring at it’s face. One wrong movement and my soul will cease to exist visibly forever.

It might be conjectured that I was there to commit suicide. However, that wasn’t the case. I was there to be lost in my contemplation without being interrupted. I admired this ambivalent feeling of being so close to death. I could hear my heart beating at a faster pace, anticipating the fall that seemed inevitable. The thought of falling and dying an agonising death did arouse different emotions within me, but I believed that when it’ll be my time to die nobody could save me.

I wasn’t there to attain closure to death. It wasn’t about me today. It was never about me, I lived for a greater purpose that exceeded beyond me. Of course, I lived for myself first and foremost, but I also lived for the people who loved and believed in me, for the people whom I loved and believed in.

Happy 17th birthday to my dear friend Christin Oyshika Gomes..  


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