What’s next?

It’s been a fortnight since I have last posted something. Not good, I can’t relapse now.

I have been back in London since Saturday afternoon. Of course, it’s not the happiest thing to leave holiday behind, but it’s not been too bad. I left my house for the first time after coming back on Wednesday to see a friend who needed an escape from guests that were coming over. I clearly need to leave my house more.

I live in a fairly nice place. It’s not too unclean, at least the residential part. The train station is only a ten minutes walk away from my home. There are two supermarkets closeby, one of them only five minutes away. A library is located right beside the other supermarket which is a maximum fifteen minutes walk away. There’s a well-known retail store and many restaurants and bars around as well. I don’t have much use for the restaurants and bars but my neighbours can enjoy them. There are halal food places around too and a halal Nando’s! There’s a park behind my house which is the only regular recreational place since I am too introverted to ever go to the centre that have small artists playing their music sometimes. There are Starbucks, Nero, Costa, McDonald’s, hair salons, boutiques, nail salons, a surgery only five to ten minutes away. It may not be the most beautiful place but definitely a place that make life easier.

Now that I am back, I have to think about the important matters. My results are going to be out in two weeks time. Until then, I don’t have the motivation to prepare for UCAS because I lack faith in myself since I know what I wrote down during the exams. Regardless, I am willing to accept the consequences.

I am in a desperate need of a job. I have been updating my CV for the past three days but realised how boring I am. I don’t have anything out of the ordinary or exciting to put down as my hobby. Not even a sport. Great.

Then there’s the issue of experience. I have experience in customer service but God forbid I ever return to retail! Being a student, this limits my options a lot. I wouldn’t mind working in a library or museum but usually they are looking for graduates and qualified individuals. I could work as a child care assistant but I just cannot bear to think about working with children. Don’t get me wrong, I am not heartless enough to hate children, but I have my sanity to think about, you see.

We were discussing about joining a beginner’s art class the other day. Turns out I can’t because they cost around fifty pounds a month without material provided for, I don’t have a freakin job. Besides, getting driving lessons are priority right now. My soul shrinks everyday, any older, I will be too scared to drive.

Three of us wants to go zip wiring. It would’ve been five of us but one of us is in Lebanon and the other in Canada. The longest zip wire is in Cornwall which is more or less five hours away, so that’s that. The other is in Wembley stadium and the view sucks. Henceforth, the only option seems to be the one in Battersea park. But it’s part of an outdoor adventure activity created by goape and costs around thirty three pounds per person. We are still not sure about that. Did I mention my mobile bill came in and it’s nearly a hundred pounds?

The last day in Bangladesh was a memorable one. I mean, everyday was. I even read twelve books! Anyways, I had the opportunity to see two of my close friends in Dhaka (where I don’t live) and I never imagined I would be able to do that. You ever seen those movies where someone gives someone else advice about if they don’t do something they will regret it forever? My other close friend, nickname Sam, send me this piece of advice after we whatsapped about it. ‘Go see them, or you will feel bad afterwards. You are going to leave again.’ Now I have no regrets!

Right now, I am counting the days till results are given out. Oh, also caught a cold after around three years. No, I did catch a cold two years ago. Remember how I was all: my gap years going to be awesome!?

At least, I got my books. It’s my destiny to read, write and dream about things that lie beyond my reach.

Oh, I just realised I can’t afford to spend money on books.



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