A day in York

Truly, it is much easier to be impatient towards another human being than to try and understand where they are coming from.

My interest in York arose when I quite wrongfully thought it was where the Brontë sisters parsonage was located. I have reasons to believe it is in the Yorkshire region but not in York city itself. Regardless, we decided on visiting York because it was not too far from Lincoln and not too small. The attractions are located close by, which helped us save money on transport.

Initially, there were going to be six of us but one didn’t make it on time to board the train from Lincoln station. Truth be told, I’ve never travelled with more than two or three people, except the time I went to Brighton as part of Girl’s Guide Senior Section, and of course trips with my family and school. But most of those were well planned out trip unlike the one to York.

We began by taking a walk along the York Walls which led to the Museum Gardens where we stopped to take too many pictures. Next, we proceeded to the York Minster or Cathedral where once again we took unnecessary (but fun) pictures. After the photo-shooting, we made our way to the city centre where we grabbed some light snacks from a bakery and sat down in Caffè Nero where I made a complete fool of myself. (At least, I have the courage to do so!)

Later, we did some more sight seeing and went to the York Dungeon which I really enjoyed. (And it was cheaper than the time I went to the one in London) The trip concluded with us visiting York Art Gallery and having lunch/dinner in Pizza Hut before heading off towards the station.

While the trip had its ups and downs, overall it was very enjoyable and a good experience. One thing in particular I learned is that everyone gets annoyed at everyone for silly reasons, including myself. While we may think we are being reasonable, we don’t try to stop and understand where someone is coming from.

My reflections are not solely based on this trip. It is more accurately based on myself and my perceptions. I am not here to put myself on a high pedestal and judge us all for something petty. I imagine, tiff between friends of varying degrees are pretty common and not usually dwelt upon.

During our trip, we had moments where we lacked cooperation with each other. One of the reasons being that we didn’t plan it thoroughly. We were tired and hungry and the day was miserable. While we did enjoy it, I couldn’t help but observe the lack of patience we had with each other. We had ‘expectations’ from each other and when they were not met, we didn’t act with empathy. Our words and actions were (subconsciously or consciously) fueled by self-righteousness and our state of mind.

I cannot tell if I am the only one who reflects upon every experience in depth. If I were to go and have a discussion regarding these events, I have a feeling that no one will remember it as I do. Neither will I remember it like everyone else. Perhaps, some will always perceive them to be on the ‘right’, some will fail to even remember any of it happening, some will feel embarrassed remembering their behaviour regardless of it being ‘wrong’ or ‘right’, while some others will shrug and move forth.

I can’t shrug and move forth because if I did that, I would never learn from my mistakes. One of my philosophies in life is that no learning experience is too insignificant, especially if it can help me grow as human being. It doesn’t have to be tragic or massive or novel to be a learning experience.

This experience may not have been significant to someone who is used to travelling in small or large groups of people. For myself, however, I have silently promised to deal with anyone less experienced than myself with kindness and compassion in order to ease their insecurity and anxiety. To be more understanding and compromise when required but remain firm as necessary. Last but definitely not the least, to not let my emotional state dictate my behaviour towards another under any circumstances.

Thank you for making it this far. Before I stop, I must clarify one thing: when I use terms like self-righteous, I am not actually accusing anyone of being such. At least not consciously. I understand that everyone is human, including myself, and we are all capable of being unkind with or without being aware of it. Our past actions don’t dictate the person we intend to become.



2 thoughts on “A day in York”

  1. I can relate with your post so well, I am also like you in the aspect of reflecting upon the past experiences and trying to make sense out of why I thought or said what I did. These past days, even I’ve been thinking along the same lines, while you did regarding friends, I had such thoughts about my family. There are times when I get really angry if my parents say something which I feel is unreasonable or if they don’t give me permission for something, but when I’m done sulking over it and truly analyse the situation, I realise that most of the times their reasonings and anger is justified.
    From what I’ve learned, one should always value other people’s opinions and try to see where they’re coming from.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me. As you can see from the post, you are not alone in this! I think it’s great that we actually practise ’empathy’ and understanding in a world where justifying self-righteousness is so easy. Here’s to always learning more!

      Liked by 1 person

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