A Quick Guide Of Things You Need When Moving Out For The First Year of University.

Obviously, everything I am going to mention here isn’t going to be applicable for everyone. There’s a good possibility that I might forget some things. Add and subtract from the list as you desire.

Bedroom and study:

  • Duvet
  • Duvet cover
  • Bedsheets – multiple, particularly if you get heavy periods. Sometimes you won’t have time to wash sheets.
  • Pillows
  • Flipflops/sandals – your floor is going to get disgusting.
  • Table lamp – one of my coursemates’ room had seriously poor lighting. Needless to say, having a lamp helped.
  • Laptop – invest in a good one. You’re going to need access to a computer every step of the way.
  • Extension cable.
  • Folders – trust me, it will help you organise your things so much better. As for general stationeries, it depends on you as an individual.
  • A sturdy, medium sized lightweight luggage – investing in a good one is worth the price.

Kitchen: this is more useful for someone moving into a studio.

  • Toaster/toastie maker (unless provided by the accommodation) – for the love of anything at all, if you are like me and know cooking is something that will take time for you to learn, get a toaster/toastie maker. Chances are you’re not going to have time to make fancy meals and opting for homemade sandwiches will help you save money.
  • knife
  • Chopping board
  • Small, medium and large plates – one of my friends (her parents) bought an expensive dinner set to university and broke almost all of them. Students just don’t throw dinner parties, it’s just not gonna happen. I, for one, don’t have a supply of easy money and have to save as much as possible. If you want to save money, just bring some cheap plates that you are going to throw away eventually.
  • 2 x bowls
  • Mixing bowl
  • Glasses and mugs – bring a few, 4 should suffice. Once again, no one’s throwing dinner parties in university. Shot and wine glasses on the other hand are a different story. I don’t drink, not a good idea for me to advice one on that.
  • Cutlery – a set containing 4 pieces of each type will do fine.
  • A few containers to store food in. If you are particularly broke, head over to poundland and get a set of 8 microwavable plastic containers. They are surprisingly handy.
  • Tea towels – wash and reuse to save money on kitchen towels. I just recently realised how much I spent on these. You do need kitchen towels but it’ll help reduce a lot of waste to have something reusable as well.
  • Frying pan
  • Sauce pans – small and large.
  • Wooden/plastic utensils – for cooking.
  • Tin can opener
  • Baking tray – may not be necessary, my oven came with one.
  • Colander – pasta is going to save your life. It’s also useful for washing fruits and vegetables.
  • Dish rack – organising made easier.
  • Kitchen scale – a small kitchen scale is incredibly useful, especially if you are awful at measuring things like me. Helps make my food a little more edible. Bonus, helps to keep track of portion size and calorie intake.

Bathroom:

  • Toilet brush with holder
  • Small bin – you can thank me later.
  • Toothbrush holder
  • Soap dish
  • Plasters, paracetamol etc.
  • At least 4 hand towels, 4 face towels and 2 bath towels.
  • Lots of underwear.
  • Shower necessities e.g. back brush, sponge etc.

Good hygiene is everything.

Now that the essentials are done, here are some other stuff:

  • Fairy lights – are you even a student if you don’t have a set of fairy lights in your room? They can also create a nice relaxing atmosphere.
  • Good pyjamas, dressing gowns and hoodies – if you are a headscarf wearer, hoodies will save your life.
  • Diffusers – because some accommodations have very sensitive fire alarms.
  • Fancy dresses – you don’t have to bring everything at one go. Usually, in October there’s a lot of themed parties. I don’t attend these as they’re not my thing but this girl once needed emergency minnie mouse ears for a house party. Besides, there are end of year balls, summer balls etc.
  • Jars – for storing biscuits and other food products.
  • Smart clothes – just one white shirt/blouse, one black trouser, one brogue/any smart shoes and one blazer will go a long way.
  • Extra blankets and throws – some accommodations have very poor heating.
  • Mesh curtains for ground to third floor – if you need the privacy, that is.
  • Microfibre cloths – for quickly cleaning your devices.

On the day you move in, you’ll have to go grocery shopping. So, here’s a basic (vegetarian) grocery list. Once again, it all depends on your lifestyle.

When moving, remember that for things like clothing you don’t have to bring it all at one go. Unless you live extremely far away, you’ll go home again and can bring back the things you left behind. Besides, you’re still living amongst civilisation and there are going to be shops there for you to buy things when you need.

Lessons from first year of University

Before August 2016, I was supposed to take a gap year (a year out of education, usually after completing A levels and before starting university) which was more of a gamble I lost. My poor grades meant I couldn’t apply for medicine and studying anything else wasn’t an option at that time.

In the UK, we apply to University through an online application process called UCAS which we send off near the beginning of A2 level or Year 13. Or so it was during my time, some things have changed since then. The deadline for medicine is in October while for everything else it’s around January/February. I can’t exactly remember. After that, it’s through ‘clearing.’ A process where you call up universities after receiving your grades and see if they will offer you a place on the subject of your choice (except medicine). But you do need to have a completed UCAS application to be eligible for a place through clearing.

I applied through clearing. Once I received my my grades and realised there’s no point in taking a gap year, I completed my application in two days and started making calls. Long story short: Lincoln was the best I could do.

I came to university without researching. I didn’t even attend the ‘open day’ held for students who are coming through clearing. That’s lesson number one: visiting university during open days. That way I would’ve been more prepared, mentally atleast. It would’ve probably opened up a window for me to have met more people. Furthermore, had I known beforehand, I would’ve joined those freshers facebook groups where one can meet people from their course and accommodation. It’s just easier to settle in when there’s a visible ‘support group’ around.

During the first few weeks, I dreaded leaving my room. I have a terrible sense of direction and I had no idea what I was doing. My confidence levels after the results were incredibly low and I just felt afraid of everything. Which brings me to lesson number two: that feeling of dread will subside no matter how unbelievable that might seem at that moment. 

I wasn’t in the best state of mind and didn’t have the courage to join any societies. Most people have their thing: Disney, Harry Potter, Anime etc. I just didn’t know what my thing was…or is. Lesson number three: join societies even if the plan to stick to it isn’t long term. Because attending that first social/event by a society can introduce opportunities one never saw coming.

I don’t drink and refuse to sesh (another term for clubbing/partying/raving) but literally 99% of the people around me do, even if it’s to an extent. Sometimes, I do have thoughts like maybe it would’ve made my life easier if I related to the habits of the masses. It’s not a secret that I am insecure about my personality and being in a situation of immense peer pressure didn’t help. Don’t get me wrong, the pressure in university is different than to being in high school. Most of which stems from FOMO or the fear of missing out.

That being said, lesson number four: life is too short to compromise values and beliefs that essentially make up one’s identity. It’s hard but priorities are priorities. In the end, no one’s going to look back and think: well, at least I fit in or at least those people I knew for like three years thought I was ‘fun.’ I wanted to be more involved with ‘internal affairs’ without having to drink or sesh, so I got a job which puts me at the centre of student affairs.

Another interesting thing I observed was that it takes longer than one might expect to really get to know someone. Even if things seem stable, for better or worse, things change throughout and quickly near the end of the year.

Lesson number five: don’t give up so quickly, things change when one least expects it to. Take small steps to change things but if something doesn’t work out, it was never meant to in the first place.

Lesson number six: for the love of anything at all, learn how to cook. Plan weekly meals to make life easier. Because I don’t eat things with alcohol or ‘meat’, I can’t just grab any ready made meal from supermarkets. Even worse, I am awful at cooking. But with practise, I’ve gotten better. I make weekly meal plans now and pin easy recipes down to try out. Pinterest recipes are life savers!

Lesson number seven: living in a private space, e.g. a studio, doesn’t mean living in isolation. There’s a fair split between people who get along with their flatmates and people who don’t. Usually, in second year people get to decide who they want to live with and have a better experience.

When I had to decide in November where I wanted to live for this year, I had only one close-ish friend and we actually considered looking at a two bedroom flat. Long story short, we are actually very different people and us living together would’ve been a recipe for disaster. Some people just need more time to find the right friends than others, nothing wrong with that.

Lesson number eight: many things will NOT go the way one may want them to. Just have patience, things tend to work out in the end. I lacked vitality and any sense of joy for the first five to eight months but things did turn out okay in the end. I don’t want to continue being friends with some of the people I’ve met. And not for any spiteful reasons either. We make different friends at different stages as we proceed through life.

Lesson number nine: not comparing experiences with others. It’s honestly pointless. Not everyone will experience the same things the same way and that’s just life.

Lesson number ten: no matter what happens, things will get easier. Including things like cleaning, cooking, adjusting to a new style of education etcetera etcetera. Some people are so focused on the social aspect, they forget the main purpose of being at an university. While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having a good time, it’s so important to realise that education is the main focus and it costs a lot too.

Personally, I don’t think my experience is a particularly relatable one. But when I was going through it, if I had found something like this it would’ve helped me cope. Most people have a fantastic time and I am sure if any student is reading this, you will too. In my upcoming posts, I will discuss my course and some of the things I plan on doing differently this year.

A letter to myself.

If you write this on a piece of paper, you will never get around to reading it again. You’re lazy like that. You were never any good at revising things. Maybe, that’s why you failed so much.

But you know, failure doesn’t have to be a permanent state and success doesn’t mean rich and famous in your book. You know that you have to go with the flow of life but never settle for anything less, as contradictory that may sound. To give it your hundred and ten percent and if it still doesn’t work out, let it be.

You have a bizarre sort of obsessive nature unlike that of inventors and them lot. Periods of dormancy and demotivation followed by euphoric visions of achievement. Sometimes, you don’t even know what that achievement you are working towards even is. But you feel so motivated and being productive the whole day feels so good that you forget. You forget that this feeling will not last long. Those periods of productive outbursts are shorter and fewer than those of demotivation and burn outs.

Back in the days, you were so clearly delusional. Even today, looking back you can’t believe that you actually fell for the lies (of unrealistic ambitions) that you told yourself. It’s difficult for you to have a clear image of what you are doing and why, when you are so into it. That it being your obsessive nature surfacing, telling you to push yourself not just to your limits but beyond which you will break.

You forget. Not everyone has the same skills or the same dreams. The breaking point differs between people. You think, if others are able to do it then why do I find it so difficult. One good thing about yourself, however, is that you stick to somethings. Not all things, sometimes you run away. But, while the things you stuck to were never a success, it made you more skilled in those areas. So, when you start something else, you have an idea of what to expect and rough skills too. Thank you for that. For not completely backing away and going above and beyond your comfort to make things easier in the present and the future.

You want to do something great. That’s what once motivated you to study medicine and do humanitarian work around the world because you don’t believe you have other useful skills. Not to be known, neither to make money. Perhaps, it’d make you feel worthy in your own eyes. Or maybe, you inherited a somewhat altruistic nature. You are rather selfish, can’t deny that.

Before your obsession to do everything takes over, remember this: at this stage of your life, your education is more important than the things you are doing besides it. You worry a lot about financial matters. Not out of greed, sometimes out of a desire to help and sometimes out of superficial reasons. Whatever you may feel, you know, money won’t buy you the redemption that you seek.

You want to be helpful in your community but you were never that great with autonomy. At the same time, you are taking steps on changing that. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Why are you always so hard on yourself? So many days, feeling down about the silliest of things.

You really dislike reflecting on your AS level year. Because after that, you realised you had some degrees of the inferiority complex. Always so insecure about your personality, forgetting how fundamentally it makes you, you. Some days, no one can stop you from feeling so very alien. You know, you’re as mediocre as they come but you feel as though no one will ever understand your life experience, your taste, your interests, the way your mind works. You never cease to feel guilty about it though. How self-centered it is wanting to be understood.

All of that aside, you must remember not to take on too much. To stop yourself, take a step back and re-evaluate what you are doing and why. You have to stop this desire to compensate for the lack of common experience you have. Not going on holidays every single summer, not being able to swim or bike, not feeling like you are a fun enough person, not doing useful work and so on. So bloody first world problems. But you feel so guilty about these feelings, maybe that’s why you want to do something for the people who aren’t lucky enough to be plagued by first world problems; A redemption for all that petty bitterness you never wanted and are never rid of.

Before you go, here’s the few things you need to remember from your past mistakes:

  • Don’t get fixated on the future and focus on the present. It’s okay to not know what you want or where you want to be. If life seems uneventful, have some faith in it and go with flow. Because either ways, you always ended up going with the flow.
  • Notice when you feel overwhelmed but never let fear hold you back. If something isn’t working out, it was never meant to be. Just leave it be and move forward.
  • Don’t let somethings you see make you bitter. Focus on the things you have rather than the things you don’t have. Improve your eating habits and lifestyle for vitality.
  • Never forget how much you enjoy learning for the sake of it.

 


Featured image collected from musings of a poetic soul via facebook.